BOOK REVIEW | Priceless by Miranda Silver

Title: Priceless
Author: Miranda Silver
Release Date: January 9, 2020
★★★★★
** Kindle Unlimited

Are you afraid of the dark, Christina? I don't need the lights on to read you like a book.
The first time I meet the wolf’s cold eyes, we’re at a college party.
Maybe you like the dark more than you think.
I just quit the cheer squad. I’m about to dump my musician boyfriend. I’m partying harder than ever. I let money run through my fingers because I’m done reaching for standards I’ll never meet.
Soon, I’m broke. And I don’t want anyone to know.
The more you hide your true self, the more you’re going to let it out with me.
I'm bubbly and outgoing. He's icy and alone. I stay away. I touch myself, thinking of him.
When I finally seek out Patrick Caruthers, he has a proposition.
Mind games. Humiliation. Control. Schedules. Him. Me.
I think you’re going to be the perfect playmate.
I'm not perfect. I'm not stunning or noble. I’m not a heroine.
You’re priceless.
I'm just a girl . . .
You were made for me.
And he’s a cold bastard
Who is paying me for sex.

THISBOOK!!!!

There are so many places that this book could have gone wrong. I mean, seriously, as I was reading there were moments when I braced myself, worried that this was the moment when a bad writing decision was going to ruin this book for me. Now, don't get me wrong, this fear had absolutely nothing to do with Miranda Silver, a new author for me that I had no reason to distrust, and more to do with a recent reading history where great premises have been obliterated by lazy characterization and poor plot decisions. With this book, though, every single time I found myself holding my breath, it went exactly the way that it should - not because it went the way I wanted it to necessarily, but because it went in the direction that made sense if the characters in the book were humans with realistic motivations and reactions. 

For the record, I fully recognize that for a book that was SO HEAVY in smut, delving into things like realistic characterization and authentic storytelling might seem a little bit silly... but honestly, the fact that this book was so sex heavy - and very, very sexy, in my opinion - and also really rang true to me from a realism and romance perspective is probably the most impressive thing. I think it's a lot easier to write all the sexy sex for the sake of sex than it is to write a really erotic romance that feels authentic and human. SO. Here's my review.... 

First off, let's start with our main character Christina. The thing that I loved about Christina was that she was consistently portrayed and made me feel so much for her, even when I wanted to shake her. Christina is a character who has been playing a role, one that is a sort of amalgamation of one she's been cast in by the people in her life as well as one she's taken on to compensate for feelings of inadequacy. One thing that I like about characters like Christina is that she has a certain peripheral awareness of why she does the things that she does, but it's not overly explicit and it's something that she doesn't acknowledge. 

{CONTEXT: In recent years, something that I've really hated in a lot of romance novels is being told a character is very damaged and very complex rather than being shown it through their actions, reactions, etc throughout the story. The absolute worst examples of this are the characters that are written in a first person narrative who straight up talk about how "broken" they are and exactly why they're so broken, without any further self examination or attempts to do the work to unbreak themselves, if you will. In my experience, especially with the new adult age range, people who are dealing with trauma or issues related to feelings of inadequacy or pain tend to develop coping mechanisms that internalize and rarely acknowledge the depth of that struggle until it becomes a problem that can't be ignored. For me, the characters that feel the most real are the ones whose evidence of the things that hurt them comes out more subtly and isn't outrightly acknowledged. Think about it... Lots of people say, "I don't believe in love," especially when they're in their early 20s, but I don't think I've ever heard anyone say, "I don't believe in love because my dad left when I was little and now I'm scared to trust men."  Because once you figure out the second part of that sentence, it's rare that you'll assert the first part. The disbelief in love tends to be the defense mechanism keeping you from having to admit that you're scared because of things you haven't dealt with.}

In this book, Christina is a character that is really, really beautifully crafted and unraveled throughout the story in a way that rings true. I love when, as a reader, I see some subtle truth about a character that they don't necessarily see about themselves yet, because it shows that the author knows that understanding the motivations of your character is important to creating a story that feels authentic. This is also true with Patrick, the hero, and also with most of the peripheral characters, even if it's subtle and brief. Even with the two more antagonistic characters in the story, I think we see motivations for their bad acts that ultimately make those things make sense. I personally don't have any interest in a story that has twirly mustache villains doing bad things for no good reason other than they're the bad guys, so being able to really, really dislike the antagonist but also understand their motivations is important to me.

Now onto the sexy bits....

There are a lot of places that the transactional nature of this relationship could have gone really wrong for me had it been written differently than it was. As it was, though, it was made really, really clear that these two people had incredible sexual chemistry and compatibility in preferences that were less than vanilla in nature. I almost feel like there was a bit of fantasy surrounding the money, but ultimately it was more of an emotional boundary for Patrick and an excuse for Christina than it was anything seedy. Again, I really do think it's owing to solid writing that this came through, because had it been presented as "desperate girl has dirty sex for money and realizes that she likes it" would have just felt uncomfortable for me, and I think for a lot of people. Ultimately, she did need money and she did take it, but it was clear that she wouldn't have if she hadn't wanted him, and also she would have gotten involved with him without the money as well. 

There's actually a scene early in the book where Christina falls into a pretty explicit sexual fantasy that I think could be easily forgettable in the grand scheme of the book, but was ultimately really important to understanding two things about Christina. The first this is that, to put it real plainly, this girl is horny. Again, might seem small, but I feel like a lot of books so firmly seem to lean on some big strong sexy man awakening sexuality in a woman, while this particular women is plenty sexual, she just hasn't quite figured out what do with that with another person. The second, and more important I think, is that it really underscores that she absolutely does want the same things that Patrick wants. Ultimately, what she's into sexually isn't tied to him, brought out by him, or shown to her by him. Their tastes, specific as they are, are really in line with each others, which ultimately leads to a really, really sexually fulfilling relationship, the first she's ever had.

I think that the way that these two characters falling in love with each other throughout the book was played really, really beautifully because rather than being told it was happening, as a reader I really got to watch it happen. I feel like that's something that is less common than I would like it to be, so to have that happen in the context of a really, really smutty book was impressive. If we hadn't seen the reactions to each other and those moments of boundaries shifting and intimacy starting to develop, I feel like I wouldn't have believed the ending or felt any connection to the happily ever after. For me, the pacing and incremental development of the relationship is really what both gave this book stakes for me and made me feel a connection to the characters, but also really did make it an erotic ROMANCE novel and not just erotica.

I honestly can't rave about this book any more than I already have and I really, really think that if this plot sounds like something that you'd be into, it's 100% one you should read. I'm actually thinking I might reread it, I liked it that much.